Don’t Believe the Lie! How to Stop Feeling Behind When You’re Single at 50 +

If you’re in your 50s, 60s, or beyond and still waiting for a spouse, the first thing I want to say to you is this:

Yes! It can feel like God is taking His time.

Yes, it can be tired, draining, and difficult to keep praying as year after year after year seemingly passes you by with nothing to show for it.

Yes, you may worry about your prospects given that God has allowed you to watch your body/figure or youth gradually succumb to the ravages of time.

Yes, you may occasionally worry that you’re going to be the one exception to the rule that says “God never forgets.”

Sis, if this is you, I want to remind you: You are at the top of God’s mind. Yet just as Jesus delayed in returning to Bethany when He heard Lazarus was sick, God’s timing doesn’t always make sense from our human point of view. So while you’re in this season, here’s what I want to encourage you to do:

• Stay the course!
• Don’t lose hope!
• Don’t look at your age and worry that God has forgotten about you.
• Don’t believe the lie that your time is running out.
• Keep praying, trusting, and waiting (with expectation).

Remember, God has shown that he is a rewinder of time (both literally and figuratively) in the Bible.

In Joel 2:25 He says, “I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten…”

Similarly, Joshua 10:12-13 says, “On the day the LORD gave the Amorites over to Israel, Joshua said to the LORD in the presence of Israel: “Sun, stand still over Gibeon, and you, moon, over the Valley of Aijalon.” So the sun stood still, and the moon stopped, till the nation avenged itself on its enemies, as it is written in the Book of Jashar. The sun stopped in the middle of the sky and delayed going down about a full day.”

While the contexts are distinct from your situation, I’m sharing these verses as a reminder that God will give back what you lost. How do I know this? Simple. Because the same God quoted in those scriptures is the same God who exists today. He can not only restore the years that you feel you have “lost,” but He can also stop time.

Now I say all of this knowing full well that you may still feel behind. Sadly, our culture often ignores or disregards women at your stage of life. They act as if once your “youth” (read: Hollywood-approved sex appeal) is in your rearview mirror, you are past your “best buy date.” I once even had a guy tell me if I ever felt like God had forgotten me on a shelf and I was steadily nearing my expiration date! Here’s the good news: God doesn’t think that way. He sees you, He loves you, and He still has plans for you (and not boring, basic plans either!).

So Here Are 5 Common Concerns You May Face in Your 50s+:

1. Menopause has already happened – The chance to have biological children has likely passed, and that can bring a unique kind of grief of its own. While you may know that surrogacy and adoption are alternative methods, you may still struggle with the grief of knowing you will (likely) never bear/carry a child of your own.
2. Fear it will never happen – After years — maybe even decades — of hoping, praying, and trusting God to provide a spouse, your faith might feel like an old, worn-out shirt — more holes than shirt at this point.
3. You’re so used to doing life alone – You’ve built your routines, your home, your peace, and your space. You wonder, “How would sharing it all even work?” “Do I want a husband, and all that entails, or am I just looking for companionship?”
4. You don’t see examples of women like you finding love – The stories you long to see feel rare so your brain (or the devil) convinces you they must not exist. Or when you finally do see those stories, you worry that she must have just “settled for less.”
5. You wonder if God said “no” – Not in anger, but in quiet finality. You wonder if maybe God said “no” and you missed it and have been praying in vain.

All of these are legitimate thoughts, worries, or concerns you might have. However, I don’t want you to stay there.

Here are 5 Truths You Need to Breathe In:

1. You are not forgotten – In Isaiah 46:4 it says, “Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He.” And in Isaiah 49:15 it says, “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!” God CANNOT forget about you and He isn’t done being faithful to you.
2. There’s still room for beauty – Sarah thought her story was over when she was in her 70s and 80s with no child to show for it. God blessed her with a son in her old age. Naomi thought her story was over after losing her husband and two sons with no grandchildren to show for it. God surprised her through Ruth’s story.
3. You are deeply valuable – Love isn’t a reward for youth — it’s a gift. You are more than worthy. In addition, you are already chosen and deeply loved by the God who loved you before you were even a thought in your mother’s mind.
4. You don’t have to earn God’s goodness – God’s love and provision aren’t based on performance. They aren’t based on what you have or haven’t done, what mistakes you have or haven’t made. God’s love and provision is based on who He is.
5. Hope is your heritage – Romans 15:13 declares that God fills us with all joy and peace as we trust in Him. Your hope isn’t wasted. Hope in God isn’t about “wishing” something will happen. Hope in God is about waiting with the expectation that you will get what you are praying for.

Encouragement for You:

You are radiant with wisdom, grace, and strength. Don’t believe the lie that it’s too late. Don’t count yourself out of the blessings still to come. Whether God brings a husband or continues to fill your life in other ways, your joy is not capped by a relationship. You are still living. Still growing. Still being pursued by the heart of God.

📚 Book Recommendation: It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way by Lysa TerKeurst
📢 Call to Action: Share this with a friend who needs to know that God isn’t finished with her yet—no matter what her age or relationship status may be.