Did you know you can hear this blog in your language? Click the globe icon above to try this out. Also, please note that this post contains affiliate links. See my Disclaimer & Affiliate Disclosure for details.
Weddings. Engagements. Bridal showers. Bachelorette trips. Baby announcements. Nowadays, it feels like they’re everywhere, doesn’t it???
You open Instagram and BOOM — another engagement post.
Your phone buzzes and you open the notification to the group text thread. You can practically hear the words in your best friend’s voice:
“I said YES!”
You smile. You quickly type, “OMG!!! 😆 Congrats sis!!! So freaking happy for you!!! 🎉💍💖” … and then as you mentally count down how many of your friends are now in a relationship (all while you have absolutely zero prospects in sight), you quietly start spiraling.
There are plenty of questions that cycle through your mind. But only one seems to be the most pressing:
“God, when is it going to be my turn?”
If that’s you, then here’s the good news. I see you. I’ve been you; and many times, I still am you. This one’s for the sister who’s strong enough to celebrate others with her hands and her words but also vulnerable enough to admit that she aches with her heart.
What If I Tell You…
…You’re not just envious — you’re human?
Let’s name it: Sometimes, there’s a guilt or even shame feeling that creeps in when you feel sad or bittersweet after hearing someone else’s good news. You start thinking:
- “Why can’t I just be happy for her?”
- “I must be a bad Christian, or a bad sister, or a bad friend.”
- “I’m obviously not content enough.”
- How come it happened for her and not for me? I’ve been waiting far longer than she has!
At times like these, you can experience envy (which is about wanting what someone else has) or jealousy (which is about feeling upset that someone has stolen or may steal something you perceive as belonging to you).
The reality is that both of those feelings are normal and human. But remember what the Bible says in Proverbs 14:30, “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.” Did you hear that, sis? Rots. The. Bones.
I don’t know about you, but I like to be able to stand and walk around because of my firm bones! So you and I need to pass on any envy/jealousy which leads to rottenness.
When you experience feelings of envy and/or jealousy, remember that’s not what God wants for you. Envy and jealousy are not your portion. Don’t compare what she has to what you lack. Instead, remind yourself Psalms 23:1, “The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.”
Remember, God is the only one who gets to choose who gets what and at what time. Thank God for blessing her/them and trust that God hasn’t forgotten about you. When the time is right for God to bless you with your spouse, the devil himself won’t be able to stop it. And if he tries, God will just run him over! 🙃
Thank God for blessing her and trust that God hasn’t forgotten about you. When the time is right for God to bless you with your spouse, the devil himself won’t be able to stop it. And if he tries, God will just run him over! Share on XWhat About Those Pesky Feelings?
Yes, envy and (unrighteousness) jealousy are to be avoided at all times. But here’s the truth: you can celebrate others and still experience feelings of grief for yourself. Why? Because you’re human.
David cried out in the Psalms. Jeremiah cried over his people. Hannah couldn’t even eat because she was so heartbroken over her childlessness, while others around her had what she longed for.
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18
God sees your private heartbreak, sis, and He’s not disappointed in you for feeling it.
What about FOMO?
What do you do when it feels like everyone is moving forward, having fun, and you’ve been left behind?
- I know what it’s like to be the single one at the bridal shower.
- I know what it’s like to avoid getting up for the bouquet toss for the 10th year in a row.
- I know what it’s like to dodge well-meaning family members and friends who try to persuade you to get on the dance floor when the DJ calls up “all the single ladies.”
- I know what it’s like to convince yourself you haven’t had any dates because you’ve been in school, when in reality your heart is closed off or you just don’t know how to date.
Sometimes, it feels like your life is just one big race — and everyone else is crossing the finish line while you’re still lacing up your shoes.
But contentment isn’t about pretending the race doesn’t exist. It’s learning to recognize that each runner is running their own race on their own course, you included.
You guys are not on the same track. You guys won’t necessarily face the same hurdles or obstacles. Their finish line may be before or after yours. So contrary to what your mind would have you believe, there’s no need to compare yourself to her.
Sometimes, it feels like your life is a big race — and everyone else is crossing the finish line while you’re still lacing up your shoes. But contentment isn’t about pretending the race doesn’t exist. It’s learning to recognize… Share on XThe “I’m Falling Behind Lie”
Let’s talk about this particular lie that the devil tries to hammer into your head.
Here’s the core belief many of us carry even if we never say it out loud:
“I’m falling behind. I’m missing out. I must be doing something wrong.”
But the Bible tells us something completely different:
“The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness.” – 2 Peter 3:9a
“He has made everything beautiful in its time.” – Ecclesiastes 3:11a
Sis, God isn’t slow — He’s intentional. He’s weaving a story with your life that isn’t rushed by timelines (yours or your family’s) or pressured by comparison.
You are not behind.
You are right where God is walking with you.
So do yourself a favor. Walk your pace with peace, trusting that God knows the route He’s taking you on (He created it after all!). And even if it looks completely different from everyone else’s, trust that God has a plan that is beyond what you could ever begin to fathom or imagine.
Sis, God isn’t slow — He’s intentional. He’s weaving a story with your life that isn’t rushed by timelines (yours or your family’s) or pressured by comparison. Share on XSo what should you do when other people are the ones forcing those comparisons on you? Check out part 2 here when it drops!