Recently, I was watching an episode of Beyond the Gates.
But there was a moment in one scene that really stood out to me.
During one interaction, a character named Mona was trying to encourage a man named Randy to go to church. Randy wasn’t exactly living on the right side of the law, and he clearly wasn’t interested.
In his mind, he was too far gone. Too messed up. Too deep in the life he had chosen. Too beyond the Lord’s help.
Now Randy is a tall, built, African American man. He looks like the kind of man who could win a fight without much effort. The kind of man who probably doesn’t look like he needs anybody to carry anything for him.
But Mona’s parting words stopped me in my tracks.
She said: “I know you have big, strong muscles. But maybe, let the Lord do the heavy lifting for once.”
Are you a ‘Randy’?
Maybe you’ve been carrying so much for so long that strength has become your identity.
Maybe you’re the go-getter, hustler, driven one, ambitious one, or the entrepreneurial one.
Maybe you’re self-sufficient, self-reliant, and self-made. You make your own money. You pay your own bills. You own your home. You handle your business.
And while there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being responsible, disciplined, or hardworking, there is something spiritually dangerous about believing you have to carry everything by yourself.
Because the truth of the matter is, the biggest lie ever told is connected to the first lie ever told: the lie that you don’t need God.
While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being responsible, disciplined, or hardworking, there is something spiritually dangerous about believing you have to carry everything by yourself. #forsinglewomenonly Share on XThat was the lie that got the devil kicked out of heaven. It’s also the strategy the enemy used in the garden.
He didn’t just tempt Eve with fruit. He tempted her with independence from God. He planted the idea that she could decide what was good, what was wise, and what was necessary apart from the One who created her. She could take care of herself.
And the enemy is still using that same lie today.
The truth of the matter is, the biggest lie ever told is connected to the first lie ever told: the lie that you don’t need God. #forsinglewomenonly Share on XHe may not be whispering to you about forbidden fruit, but he may be whispering:
The devil wants you to believe the lie that you are alone: alone with your bills, your pain, your suffering. This can show up based on the way you’ve been “wounded” in the past.
Wound: Maybe people didn’t show up for you when you needed them most.
Scar: So you learned how to show up for yourself.
Wound: Maybe someone promised to love you and then left.
Scar: So you learned how not to need anyone or hold people loosely.
Wound: Maybe you grew up in survival mode.
Scar: So now softness feels unsafe.
Wound: Maybe you asked for help and no one gave it.
Scar: It’s hard for you to ask for help or even harder for you to receive it.
But this is your wake-up call:
God doesn’t want you to live that way.
Yes, loss, breakups, setbacks, disappointments and betrayal may happen.
Waiting may get heavy. Singleness may feel lonely. Finances may be in hell. The future may look uncertain.
But God never asked you to carry all of that by yourself.
Jesus says, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest”.
Not “come to Me after you’ve handled it.”
Not “come to Me when you’ve figured out a way to get yourself out of the hole you dug for yourself.”
Not “come to Me once you’re stronger, prettier, more healed, more disciplined, or more emotionally stable.”
He says come.
Come you who are weary, burdened, tired, discouraged.
Come after the breakup, after the crying spell, after the job loss, after the rejection, and after the night you almost gave up.
Come with the burden still in your hands. And then let Him help you carry what you were never meant to crush you.
I once was struggling under the weight of a lot of debt. I knew I had made poor choices; and I was budgeting and doing all of the things to get back in the red.
Then one day, after watching a YouTuber’s story of how God eliminated their 5-figure debt, it dawned on me. Just because you put yourself in the hole doesn’t mean God won’t help you get out of it. So I prayed.
Would you believe the SAME day (that evening) someone randomly gave me $300?! All of this time, God wanted to help me. I just needed to be willing to receive His help.
Just because you put yourself in the hole doesn't mean God won't help you get out of it. Pray now! #forsinglewomenonly Share on XSome of you are struggling with discouragement, financial despair, depression, and even hopelessness because you’ve been trying to do life in your own strength. You’ve been saying you trust God, but living like everything depends on you.
You’re exhausted because you’ve been trying to be your own protector, provider, comforter, strategist, and savior.
But you were never created to live independently of God. You were created to be utterly reliant on Him.
Psalm 55:22 says, “Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you.”
Not “some” of your burdens.
Give Him the heavy stuff too.
What if I told you healing begins after you finally stop performing strength and start practicing surrender?
Maybe the breakthrough isn’t in trying harder; it’s in handing it over to a God who loves you and wants to be there for you.
Maybe the Lord is gently saying to you:
“I know you have big, strong faith, discipline, budget skills, goals, and resilience. But maybe, let Me do the heavy lifting for once.”
What if I told you healing begins after you finally stop performing strength and start practicing surrender? #forsinglewomenonly Share on XAsk yourself honestly:
Where am I trying to do life or this season in my own strength?
Where have I become so used to carrying weight that I don’t even recognize when something is too heavy?
Then ask yourself this:
What is the biggest burden on my plate today?
Maybe the breakthrough isn’t in trying harder; it's in handing it over to a God who loves you and wants to be there for you. #forsinglewomenonly Share on XName it and be specific.
Is it your desire for marriage?
Now take that burden and speak to yourself with honesty and compassion:
“I know you have big, strong __(fill in the blank__). But maybe, let the Lord do the heavy lifting for once.”
Not because you’re weak.
But because He is strong.
1 Peter 5:7 says, “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.”
That means your concerns matter to Him.
You don’t have to keep carrying what God has already invited you to surrender.
So today, let this be your invitation.
Put the weight down, open your hands, tell the Lord the truth.
And for once, let Him do the heavy lifting. Sometimes strength is finally surrendering.
What burden have you been carrying in your own strength? Take a moment today to write it down, pray over it. And if this spoke to you, share it with another single woman who’s been strong for too long. She may need the reminder that strength isn’t always carrying more.
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